So U quit Smoking 2? Let’s feel superior together

I don’t believe in quitting itself. With the point that what you do or achieve is not what you are. I don’t brag about quitting cheesecake … but i have quit it. Lol. I quit watching so much tv. I quit eating breakfast. Decided breakfast was bad.

This is fun….. how many things have i quit in life? I quit soda pop. Was drinking 2 cases of pop a week. I quit that years ago. I quit drinking wine. Or beer. Or any alcohol. I quit going commando under jeans. Lol … i quit tea recently. Caused kidney stones.

I quit going to doctors for ailments. Now look them up online. Use home remedies or figure out better ways myself. I quit eating out … funny thing about that … it went hand in hand with quitting driving. Ends the temptation to go to a drive through.

I quit drinking coffee for awhile. That didn’t last. I stopped jogging for exercise at one point. Took up walking instead. I quit going to a gym years ago, it turned into such a racket that i couldn’t stand the entire club scene. I quit trying diet after diet. After diet.

I quit going to church for a long time in my life. Now I’m hooked on it again. I used to spend hours shopping. Now i go in and out. Mostly. Try not to get distracted. I used to pay absolutely no attention to politics. So that stopped.

I’ve quit reading as much as i used to. That was a very hard thing to quit, and I’m backsliding some. I quit wearing flip flops. Mostly because getting old and my bones are not as strong. I quit depending on food only for vitamins, and take vitamin pills now.

I quit being as nice as I used to be. I quit that–turns out it’s not very good for your health. I quit living for one day at a time and I quit believing in life eternal. Go figure, “all things in moderation” applies to philosophy, too.

I stopped trying to compete in areas where I already proved myself inept. Recently I’ve quit owning chaos and am ordering all of life like a squirrel counting its nuts. Proved myself inept at that before, turns out it’s an age thing.

I quit buying or wearing different colored socks. I have black and white. That’s good enough. I quit buying shoes that are too small for me, just because I liked the fashion. If anything, the entire world should praise me for quitting that. But smoking? Please.

Some of the best people I have ever known in my life were/are smokers. That correlation didn’t happen by accident. There is something about the ability to interrupt anything, and take a moment to sit and watch your breath dissolve into the air. Things in life are too often socked into good or bad. More often than not, they are both.

If you want a prize or medal for doing something or not doing something, well that negates the entire point doesn’t it? Good choices are their own reward. Each step is one more to the grave, regardless. And if today can be happy, isn’t that the most any can hope for?

So often crowd manipulation takes on a life outside reality. Never make it your guiding star. Never. Rebellion is too important. Experimentation is too important. Take it from an old broad. Life itself is too important. Faith has its roots in what we know and don’t know.

There are a lot of things I’ve quit. I pretty much don’t count the days or pat myself on the back for any of them. Life is a continuous formula. The entrance or exit of one variable is little cause for celebration. Happy Pi day.

Oh … I quit pie, too. Can’t make crust worth a darn anymore. lol…


The science of Sounds and Grunts

The best way to understand English
Is to realize it’s not about meaning of words

English is grunts.

Think of all the vowel sounds,
and some of the consonant ones like S and TH
as grunts

and there are more than one sound per letter on vowels
has what we call long and short — germans have umlats

the meaning or “grunt” is the actual meaning of the word

so when someone says, “that SUCKS!” they aren’t saying it pulls on something

they are using the vowel sound of UGH … yuck ….putz …stuck … muck

duck? maybe too much duck poop at one point

so English has meaning that is not randomly assigned to the terms,
but gains much of meaning through use, or the grunt factor

we grunt “Aye!” in agreement ……… Aye Aye!!! comes with a yes meaning for that sound

bye sigh why my die lie ……… they are all absolutes

I know it’s hard to accept, and I’ve never before heard anyone state this,
but English at its foundation is grunting at each other.

RRRRRRR sound … is an anger sound.

Our use of language, is why I don’t find the “coming from apes”
part of evolution very implausible

because we grunt like apes at each other, in English

and you know, how some people speak, and it just rubs you the wrong way?

that’s because some of their grunts are inverted, probably due to location
or exposure to a cultural change of some kind

so i ended that last line with “i” …….. it means: YES!

dum de dum in the WH ends his tweets with “Sad!”

the sort of short E sound …… what is that in grunts?

“THERE!!!! THERE!!! or in spanish — ESTA!!!

that one …………….. pointing out a problem

you have to respond, yes, get them … or no, that’s not it.

so it’s complex … but it’s not


English is just a language that developed WITH the inbuilt grunts of meaning, not despite of it.

Short “I” — the small-range yuck sound.

Why this information is handy ……. is because the most important part of poetry is always the close.

the last thing said before expecting response.

what KIND of grunt you use at the ending — effects the selection of response

Hissing noise ……. the “S” sound … spitting — anger

it’s not hard

But it becomes so incredibly insane in the outcomes, with expectations for response …that
you cannot imitate american english, no matter how well you use it

there is no way for a foreign person to process the grunts fast enough
to realize the correct grunt reply — or to understand how those cliches
match geographic and timelines

therefore …….. i’m calling it a day

“hey — long A — eyyyy” means “let it be so”

“oh … yo… mow … go” means “now i see”

there is an underlying code of language
the grunts of meaning


made so that you can say something ……
can say whatever …. and that’s not what you really mean

“E … long E …. eeeeee … tree … bee … me” means THIS THIS –here here — or food here

which considering we made the self designation as ME … is a little disturbing 🙂

i’m not sure how i know the grunting sounds ………. might be from watching too much tarzan
which would make it a self-fulfilling prophecy kind of observation, but for one thing:

when i worked at the hospital
and a patient lost their speaking ability due to a stroke
they could still grunt

and i could interpret the grunts
i was the only one that could

but they were there
the foundation of meaning hardwired into the brain

think about it

(short “I” sound means ….)

this is what is meant by phonetics, btw
how sound and meaning have a connection beyond singular designations of meaning for terms

there is a collective meaning

according to the grunts

“U … uh … dumb … plumb” means the punch to gut or the belch

then when you get into the higher language, of better literature … the grunts disappear.
in some sense, it’s more complicated without the grunt running through it. as a separate code.
you must have the actual meanings memorized in a usable format with a foundation of several hundred working terms

but in some ways … in some ways … the use of direct-term meaning (minus grunts) is boring
is LESS complex — and there that is why it puts you to sleep

that is why some teachers put you to sleep
and some wake you up and become invigorating to hear

it’s why there are degrees of what is and is not interesting

and it’s why …. it’s why ………. language and English can be far more intriguing than math

think about it

i have

life is too short

“Or … more … sore … bore” means “of course” or “certainly”

and don’t tell me this is crazy

or even think this is crazy ……. i’ve thought about this a long time
that patient
where i could understand her when no one else could?

i was a young woman preggers with my daughter ……

preggers = pregnant ………. why preggers? why indeed

“A … short A ” means “THERE! THERE!” and “RRRRR … RRRR…” means what? Anger

in changing the word pregnant to the word preggers — it went from excitement to upset

and that, my friends — is how english is built and grows
it’s how we work the code
and how the various layers create almost a live creature

stretching and moving and becoming a mirror image
of the people it occupies

Peace … Love … and Mock and Dole 🙂 (AHHHH OHHHHH …. uh oh –you’re in trouble) that’s a duel-grunt. we have those, too
My my

The interest rate is sweat

I’m thinking about the effects of jealousy
i had a unique experience of being raised two different ways

first with parents
there were no chores and no allowance
no discipline much
other than outbursts

second way was with my grandmother
where there were chores
AND some chores were paid according to how much work you did

AND there was an understanding
that you were to behave, or else

now i remember being jealous of the kid on the block who got a guitar for Christmas

i remember
those feelings of hopeless envy

with the change to earning my own money
small though it was
i don’t remember ever having those feelings
of jealousy again
except once
when we were forbidden to have a doll that you put make up on,
and my cousin got that doll.

But other than that… even when my cousin got a giant
supermarket pretend set, i wasn’t jealous
i thought it was neat
But i didn’t have that awful feeling

It’s not just out of reach that creates
The worst feelings of jealousy
It’s the oppression combined with that

The sense of unfairness
combined with nothing you can do
on your part
is going to change the unfairness
so it is combined with despair

envy combined with despair

But when given an outlet…
a way to earn your own money
the answers are there

i worked as soon as i could with a permit.

So i could have my own money
and when i got a directive at 17 that no dog was allowed
i got one, anyway.

brought it home
and i worked and i paid
for all of the vet bills
for all of the feeding

and unfortunately my uncle
was stuck with a lot of the dog dirt
when he mowed

maybe i was getting back for the unfairness
of the supermarket play set and the make up doll

hard to say
maybe that was more because i hate that part
of dog ownership quite a lot….

anyway….. feelings of envy
become the big monster we know as jealousy
when combined with inevitable oppression.

something to look at

when you have the path available
to get your heart’s desire
there is no one preventing you but yourself

and a very real question then arises

Is forced to the very front
and that question is:

do i really need it?

The distinction is made between need and want
the process of justification of need

and the process of cost
goes beyond just money and into
the perceptual realm of effort

chores for money

she paid $1 for a bucket of dandelions
and that saved eternity

Time and the Hero

you don’t have to be
the hero in your own story
you can be the side kick
to the beauty in your mind

don’t have to cry the tears
don’t have to fly the years
to settle in
you take the wins
and put the daggers back

there’s no easy way
to hold it all in place
no proven list of answers
that the next in line can trace

the gift of others
always only brings
the tried and true
perfection in the stones that will not sing

and i’ve loved and lived
and seen the depths of glory

i’ve been the way of ethos
and i’ve stopped the massive tide

don’t have to be the hero
don’t have to be a star
it’s so good to be alive….

never save the day

no, i need one book that’s mine
but i refuse the champion’s line

don’t have to be the hero
of my own story

Karma be Damned

there are two types
Of people

those who go through hardship and

it hurts them to see others go through the same thing

and those who say, “good! i hope others get to feel now what i suffered!”

And i don’t know why
Only know this difference exists

You either protect or you hate
either help or laugh

either exist for all or consciously selfish

where selfish lives
it is a place of bleak desires
empty sales to the self

roads peppered with hanging trees
paths stretching as far as the eye could see….
into hopelessness

i wonder the point, sometimes

It’s infinitely more selfish to be kind
to not sacrifice idealism on the alter of despair

to not believe in hurting anyone….
even yourself…
more than necessary

to think its enough… there’s enough sorrow in this world

mine won’t add to it

So i think there are two types of people,
ones who think revenge is more important than justice

and ones who believe IN justice
because there’s no such thing as revenge