Self the Future Holds

I am the precursor
Did I ever tell you
That before the Disney Frozen phase
And the pop hit “Let it Go”
I painted “Let it Go” on a painting
And before I left California in 2007
I set that painting in my living room
With the pics of my 2 kids
And I wept and wept and wept
And I sang and sang … telling
Myself that I needed to let go
To let it go ….

Therefore I ignored the Frozen movie when it came out
and the song that was being sung
across the nation in the backs
of mini-vans by children ….

I ignored it
Because who needs fate mocking you? that severely?
Who needs such proof?

not me …………
I love the random
The beauty of unexpected ventures
I love looking at the sky
And never knowing what I’ll see …

And I am the precursor

To see and measure and bleed before
To quicken or slow
To raise or fall

To sooth and say nothing
There is no way for my being to instruct
No path that perfects … insolence

But if I’m smiling
You know the mine is fine
Air is clear

If I’m flapping and struggling
You know danger is upon
And if I lose all self-regard because of fear
The complete insanity of lost minds

Then ends dance so close that
Any salvation is matter of luck alone

Couldn’t say why
I can disengage, now … remove
from that crank or foresight and find
refuge in the now

ok, I always could
just didn’t always let on
show the real of the variegated realities

I don’t worry about much
true

tomorrow I won’t worry again
but maybe you should
maybe should

like 3 weeks in
to get to watch the always missed
a treat
And to let it go
truly let it go means nothing … nichts

except never forget
the poet finds other
the other meant
“to let” is slice and bleed
oozed and spent

how does your physician heal?
mine is slow and very slow

and I cried true tears only for my vision
only for ME, they remain

and refrain

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