free to correct

the biggest challenge is the real
versus not real

if i do anything when not fully awake
weird stuff can happen

but since it’s electronics
it’s interactive
and i’m not sure if interactive hallucinations are even possible

few days ago i wake up and go to answer a comment
on facebook
i know i’m not fully awake but feel ok
to type something …. and it autocorrects

now the reason this is not possible
is i keep auto correct OFF

so i repeat it … it autocorrects again
changes the word trumpers to trumpets

it even changes it to the original word
when i back space …. i finally get it fixed
enter the comment
and go look at the settings … which still have
the autocorrect OFF

i turn it on and off again, though typically with
the android controls there is not a computing possibility
for a switch to be stuck or misrepresented

what happened shouldn’t have happened
but i felt like it happened because my mind
was not fully online
so if i am not plugged in correctly, does everything
just go to chaos and heck?

i’ve had similar very strange things happen
with electronics when not fully awake yet

that moment of coming back to yourself
after being lost in sleep and dreams

and logically, i could or should just chalk
it up to a very specific form of
mis-seeing when in that spot directly between
the waking world and the sleeping world….

but it bothers me
because i have to be seeing reality
i don’t know how to explain

it’s not fear of losing my mind
because been there, done that
it’s a fear that without the structure
of my waking mind, nothing would have
any structure at all

how thoroughly do we create our own fate?

the tablet shouldn’t have done that
it shouldn’t be able to just decide
to autocorrect a word when set to not
this is a machine — it doesn’t get to decide

but in that dimension
that place in time between waking and sleeping
even computers break their bounds

the world dissolves from its order

and who am i to say it shouldn’t?


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