to feel welcomed
and cared-for
part of my delusional process or fear
is that others want to see me
lose it
that there is not only no sympathy
but a hope for getting to
laugh at the crazy woman
part of me can’t shake
that feeling
and part of me has no ability
to live with the shame
so to have a group
people
that want to see you in good
health
that don’t tear down
but build up, instead
it helps reverse that feeling
that people want to drive you mad
are waiting and hoping
to see you fall
to madness
that there can be some understanding
i am grateful
glad that the world has those
who are in no need to laugh
at the misfortune of others
just because you are weak at one point
doesn’t mean your strength is of no value
i have limits
and forget i’m not super woman
think i can stand it all….
you know the poet from nigeria
offered that someone like stomp
in africa he would be taken out
and beaten
an immediate solution
class and economics
system
cost
tenets of freedom
structure
i don’t know if i will ever beat insanity
i don’t know if i will ever be friends with insanity
but by god i will find a way
to leave insanity behind
on my way to understanding human kind
sometimes people care about you
even when you’re crazy
or they see you as a good person
having a bad time
not as a bad person
getting their just desserts
taunting, laughing, enjoying
the pain of others
these things make me despair about the
human condition
but you can’t make that all that you see
the sun shines also
on cement
as well as flowers…
sometimes on difficult journeys
i pretend to know all
everything is mine!
yet fear i know so very little
life will go wrong and cannot go
right all the time
…. but all turns in the path
belong to everyone
we share that much
