we’re off to see …. the jailer?

Sally called her car mechanic
who wasn’t doing such a good job
and said she will be taking the car to
a different mechanic
and the mechanic said she had to
set up and pay for a meeting with him,
and that she would not be able
to take her car to a different mechanic
until he said it was ok for her to do that …

now how insane would that be?
yet with this medical outfit, who is hired by ME
and there is NO injunction or court-ordered care
or anything like that ……..
yet for some reason they have decided i am ‘captured’
and that the doctor needs to ‘release’ me
before i can hire a different doctor

now IF you are in a hospital
a doctor must “sign a release”
but how in heavens name are they justifying
this fascist system on an outpatient basis?

makes me want to tell ’em all to take a flying leap
is SO reminding of the cable company — the only
game in town and so you get this weird
type of abuse of authority ….
(ps has nothing to do with insurance or insurance requirements,
my coverage is part of federal system)

North Valley Mental Health
Dr. Ahmed …. she is like the poster-child
for poor mental health
is almost TOO ironic for me to take
it is depressing just to see her, has this
worn-out air to her and never smiles
never in a normal mood
is also always distracted like she herself
took too many ambien ….

North Valley sent out letters that you are not
to talk to your doctor about anything going on
in your life, are only allowed to talk to them
about medications.
so ok, i do that and this doctor can’t even get
THAT right, sends the prescription to the wrong
pharmacy ….. and like how do you deal with
THIS degree of incompetence — so she comes back
from vacation and says is only taking morning
appointments …. which i NEVER make morning

but now they want my insurance to pay for yet
another appointment with this doctor, so i can
ask her in PERSON, because i guess she doesn’t know
how to use a PHONE — to “release” me to at least get
a different doctor …and i’m
like when in hecks sake was i “captured?”
she was hired by ME, i should be allowed to fire
her and see someone else. but they don’t work it
that way ….. all has to be where the LOWLY mental
health client is under their thumb. if this is how
they treat a voluntary patient, what is happening to
those who are forced into this system?

i brought my car to the mechanic
and he is saying he must charge me for
an appointment so that he can LET me see
a different mechanic ….

so what is abuse of power?

it has me going OMG this system is COMPLETELY corrupt
like i knew it was kind of corrupt, if you read on the
contracts between North Valley and the city/state …
all kinds of weird back-scratching going on there.

but holy moly …… and find myself asking myself,
what if she says no?
what IF she says screw you you have to keep
seeing me because i’m so great and you are nothing
but a sad mental patient?

what if! what if Sally’s mechanic said NO– you don’t get to
hire a different mechanic, me and ALL the other mechanics
have a deal and they now won’t work on your car
unless i say they can …… that is a sure-fire system
to support and promote incompetence.

i mean we KNOW this! everybody knows this…

leaves me going what in heavens name is going ON???
am sad for these people
for whatever hole they are stuck-in
and is not just the doctors that are overly-morose
the nurses, too … no sense of humor
and like talking to officers of the Third Reich
who should i salute?

is completely absurd — and they are BAD
you go there
in a fine mood and then exit the building
2 hours later for a half-hour appointment
frowning like everybody else and carrying
all that weight of a hatred….
a simple hatred of LIFE
that they freely dispense on people trying NOT
to see life that way
who are in mental states that need to be HELPED,
not hurt
… this is a dance beyond irony

who are we supposed to thank for the mess?
does he hide behind a green curtain
in the emerald city built by drug companies
surrounded by miles and miles of poppy fields …

poppy fields that the snow never silences

i’ve had quite enough …. RELEASE ME! by all
means release me and let my captor be someone
else on your prison-ship……
out of the frying pan into the fire

can only leave when you decide it can’t get any worse
hotel California has seen NOTHING on hotel Utah
and i am afraid …. no i am sure
will just be more of the same
because it is a system of incompetence

it is a place that ENSURES its clientele
through an established system that guarantees
incompetence within its doctors and staff

and i am only human
….with a long dreary walk through one of the worst areas of town
to a building tall and grey past the car dealerships
and tattoo parlors
where i walk quickly and pray am not mugged

4 Replies to “we’re off to see …. the jailer?”

  1. Jeezly Crow, that is truly insane. And it’s enough to make a person crazy having to find their way through the maze of red tape and rules and regulations…probably all so someone at the top can continue to rake in more and more money. Any chance you could talk to Ms. Ditzy’s superior to get a straight freakin’ answer as to WHY you have to be “released” to find a different doctor?? OMG I would probably be frothing at the mouth mad if I had to go through all that.

    1. i have had the froth beaten out of me over the years….. but the whole being treated as a non-person gets really old. i have decided to transfer to their south branch, but just doing that has been over a week and i’m still waiting for a phone call. i saw the doctor and she said it was the therapist who had to work a transfer.

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