theory, theory, wherefore art thou theory

just because every gunman is a loner
doesn’t mean every loner is a gunman
just because you have to have mental issues
to go off like that
doesn’t mean every person with mental issues will go off
and do you SEE what you are doing?
because i do
i see what you are after
working to isolate a type
to judge and condemn before any action

when some of the greatest thinkers in the world
we’re loners
some of the most creative minds
had their mental issues

guilty before proven innocent
i see what you are after
stop them!  stop them!  stop them!
round up the ones who might
be bad
and then do what?
make them like everybody else?

as a person who has never been like anybody else
i have to protest
these knee jerk reactions
the town is sick!
it is because of money and loans
power of banks
so let us round up all the jews…. for
that is where the sickness is

oh don’t stand on your high horse
full of what an awful
troubled loner would do….
when there are plenty of loners
that do not go on shooting rampages
there are plenty of the mentally ill that
do not fantasize about death

it’s a very basic mathematical principal
not mutually exclusive
so the only thing you gain
by saying, “well, he was a loner
and strange and troubled person”

is to be saying that of course
strange and troubled people are the problem

which is not true
every gunman might be strange and troubled
but not every strange and troubled person
is a gunman

get it straight

because not every perfectly adjusted person
is never a gunman
and the fact is i see what you are doing

it’s THEM
and US

but i say
it’s YOU
you are the gunman
you are man on the street begging for coins
you are the person walking their dog
riding their bike

it’s you
every person is you
every person is your creation
because you are part
of this world
of mankind

so what does it take to be a gunman?
i really don’t care

i’ve never wanted to be one

what does it take to be an artist?
probably a lot of the same things it takes to be a gunman
what does it take to be a caring person?
to shake your head and say “how terrible. ”

what does it take to be a caring person with a brain?
i don’t care if he was a strange loner or the
captain of the football team
what he BECAME was a gunman
oh but the captain of the football team would not do such things!
no, he just joins the army
and shoots men in other countries
the way it’s supposed to be done
and just as dead
just as dead…..

mutually exclusive
a mathematical principal
not all soldiers are football captains
not all football captains are perfect
not all soldiers perfect football captains

do you know how big your problem is
to compute sets and subsets
as always being mutually exclusive?

i’m more angry at the bad math
than i am about the isolation
and persecution of specific groups
or the demonization
of specific personality traits
i’m more angry about the bad math

you know what i told the doctor
who said i had a personality disorder?
i told him, “you don’t like my personality?
well isn’t that too bad …. i don’t like you, either.” 

you don’t like me,
i’m not here to be liked

in fact, i’m not sure why i’m here
but i know that it isn’t to
do everything exactly as expected
just to be liked

i mix it up
i watch
i see things like people
wanting to isolate traits
saying of course, that is why
when it is NOT why
do you have ANY concept of the probability
factors you would have to see
for that to be judged a casual factor?

if being a loner causes a boy to be a gunman
then what percentage of loners are gunmen?
for every one that goes on a shooting spree,
how many are there that do NOT?
and we are talking percentages so low
you might as well say every lemon is sweet
because the one i had today
was not a bit sour

eh….. it’s fact that a killer is a killer.

is the answer
that to make less killers
we must make less strange loners?

no….. because less strange loners
probably means less writers, less artists,
less geniuses, less scientists
….. less computer techs……. i could go on….

mutually exclusive
the path of intersecting sets and subsets
get it straight
understand that the only way to prevent
gunmen from mowing down
children in a school
is to shoot the gunman

which is exactly what we did

and the way to make it not become a pattern
is to determine what makes the pattern attractive
not determine what type is attracted to it

because the latter is the thinking of the bigot
and the former is the thinking of a problem solver

what makes shooting up a classroom attractive?
what makes postal workers shooting up their place of work
what makes that attractive?
what are the key factors?
because it’s not their fault
they are products of the system

did the post office system change?
you bet it did
you do realize that we could simply drug all the drinking
water to make docile citizens?
you do realize freedom comes with a price

what makes it attractive to bring a gun to school
and use it?
not what is wrong with the student
what makes them feel that’s the right thing to do?
just because it’s easier to say they had problems
does not solve the question
because every single one of their problems
are the same problems many others have
that do NOT kill, that are NOT attracted to shooting up a classroom
why is it attractive to shoot up a classroom?

work on that.
it might be as simple as each one has a giant clock
or might be from the seating arrangement
ducks in a row
it might be pressure of grades or
the fact that children can be cruel
but what is the change within school systems
what are the combined factors
like cellphones and more choices
more confusion
less expectations?  more expectations?

what are the counter-measures
what are the points to begin experimenting with change?

clamp down tighter on mental illness!
yea, that’s really going to be the answer
when many of the drugs remove inhibitions
and could potentially make things worse
look for warning signs!
again that is placing causality upon the object that is
effected, not the point of origin

why now?  why are there school shootings?
kids aren’t getting enough sleep
kids got subjected to baby einstein
kids are getting worse nutrition because of gmo’s

take your pick.

but kids are loners, kids are angry teenagers
and mentally ill?
has always been so
what is the attraction to shooting up a school?
why do these gunmen feel the need to act that way?
why are gunmen attracted to shooting up the school
what attracted them to that action?

why is it that spot
that point
not what is wrong with that gunman
what is wrong with him is that he was attracted to shooting up a school
we can’t change each individual before they are attracted
we can only change the thing that is attracting

it’s math
it’s options
it’s pull your heads out of the media (a$$) haze
that is only interested in creating a witch hunt
which guesss what?
creates more confusion and blaming
and guess who then covers that story, the media
so look….

do something about the system.

the fault is not the person.
they are all one of us….
we are them
it’s a problem that can and will be solved
but not by making people more suspicious
of each other
that just gives us a whole new set of problems down the road


no title

phallic symbols
spreading seed
population squeezed
fantasies of death
boiling and bubbling
going off
despair and unfairness
n o  e m p a t h y
hardened complexities
phallic symbols
shooting seed
power online
no power where stand
all a game
all a game
shoot shoot
bang bang
not the loner
not the loner

tomorrow we blame something new
population overflowing
phallic symbols
bang bang


Microsoft why oh why

There is nothing like installing a new Windows system to make you question how absurd things can get. And it is the update process, where I would just laugh if it did not cost so much in time and aggravation.

I mean what kind of irony IS it, when the update to the update program, is what has the worst bugs? And THEN how do you fix that? With an update patch to the update for the update program. And by that point I seriously think there needs to be a different form of approach by the Microsoft programmers.

My question becomes, IF the update to the update program needs a patch, why not rewrite the update to the update program WITH the bug fixes so that the patch is then not necessary?

I don’t understand why nothing … nothing in this system is rewritten. It is only added-to and on-top of until there are SO many running services that it has become a monster house of cards. And it’s as if those who are writing the programming, are separate and apart from those who are trouble-shooting the actual function of it. It’s as if Microsoft has one source of programming, generated by some other entity that they stole from them or got in some way that gives them no access to those who wrote the programming in the first place.

You know I’m creative, so I think up all kinds of reasons why I am seeing this pattern of patch this and patch that but never go back and rewrite the programs themselves. Never go back and consolidate function of the 20 processes launched all for the same purpose. Never go back to streamline or create a viable build.

It has me all over the place, wondering if the U.S. is just stealing technology from another source. Wondering if the U.S. is just using technology from crashed alien spaceships. Wondering what in heck’s name is up?

It makes doubt my own sanity. But as I update the update for the third time (with the patch on hand on the desktop), hoping for different results — I remind myself that I did not create this situation. Am only observing it. Microsoft, why oh why? There has to be a better way than this.

to get what you want

do people really spend time
figuring out how to put a wrench in things?
of course they do
it’s just that when i’m all alone
in the processing of smoother results
the road blocks become a mystery
because i don’t think like that
i don’t think
what frustrates this person most
and what can i do to harm them?
so i often miss the machinations

it takes one to know one?
if you can’t beat them, join them?
truth is
saw it all in grade school
ignored because what can you do….
stand back to observe a little better
it’s the paths taken
the biggest objective

i suppose manipulation is the key
but i always just let them pass me by
let others design and orchestrate
dreams of out-smarting
and out-maneuvering

the many weary ways the human ego
seeks to ensure itself
i am best

maybe it was the time spent
with my grandmother when i was young
lessons given and long forgotten
but still there in a framework
of comprehension

or maybe i dismissed the goals of others
as petty and short-sighted

there is what you need to live:
shelter, food, occupation
but the most important need of all
is respect for yourself

it does become difficult
if constantly standing on the outside
but would be even more difficult
when engaging in constant ploys
for the game
“i’m better than you are”
the games that involve more the thwarting of others
than ways for everybody to see better ends

abuse of power?
yes, there’s that
but also the goal of power itself
i ignore various ways
because have seen it as a waste of time
if they ever came to me and asked
” what should we do? ”
i would have said it’s too late
you have already gone the path
of only serving yourself

it just gets uglier as you go along
and i suppose my own stand
has its own smug way
but the backbone is made mostly out of sorrow
pained constriction
in the lone observation;
the part of me that goes
go ahead and play
because the only answer i have
is that it costs much less to the soul…
to be kind

and i always counted cost


how many feet do i have to put down

i’m tired of living in a world of morons
because of morons
i have to click an extra bar informing the person
who JUST set a video to play full screen
that they just set a video to play full screen

because of morons
we have “soft returns” in text entry
since they could not figure out that
in computer typing you don’t hit
return and let the program determine
line breaks

because of morons
we have to have things like seat belt laws
laws for driving with cellphones
laws against driving drunk
laws against poisoning yourself…

because of morons
every program asks me if i actually want to close it

because of morons
crosswalk countdown signs don’t actually give
you enough time to cross a road unless you run

because of morons
shopping carts are broken or filled with trash

because of morons
i get my time wasted
i get my money wasted
i get my LIFE wasted

i want a world without morons

trust me ….

if i ever commit suicide
my suicide note won’t contain regrets
or how i should have done better and how
i just can’t stand to live any longer …. NO!

my note will say you all are just too stupid
and i’m tired of how stupid everybody is
i’m sick of a world that bows and bends
to achieve mediocrity in all things…

i just can’t take it anymore
you all are just too dang stupid for me to put up with …

that’s what i would say in a suicide note
a final good-bye

would be ME saying “THANKS FOR NOTHING!”
the diction in newspapers goes down 3 grade levels every year
pretty soon they will be talking in goo-goos and ga-gas

oh the world is owned by morons!
i can’t stand it

it’s like intelligence never mattered
it’s like we took the least common denominator
and blew it up into a giant cross for everyone to bear…
carved paths going to a future that just
becomes more absurd

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