more and more, i am noticing computers doing weird things. as a programmer, i don’t BELIEVE in happenstance. if something works a certain way, it’s because it was PROGRAMMED to work that way.
now i’m not so sure.
too much in the way of inconsistencies is hitting my feeble brain, and i’m tallying the odds. granted, working with a beta-version operating system doesn’t help. even sitting here thinking of the examples to give, i don’t know where to start. is it more of a feeling?
i couldn’t say. but i’m starting to feel like a wrangler rather than a programmer. like maybe these things are alive. like there is no explanation for the gift of random, and modes of behavior should NOT be based upon my need for compliance. then again, that more or less is a description of mental breakdown within a centrifuge of causality.
more probably than little beings or spirits being part of computing. yet i wonder ….
grandma used to talk to her car, gave it a name. believe it or not, even though you gave ME the tag of insanity, i’m the one that DOESN’T do that. i’m the one who DOES NOT grant access to foolish notions.
never did. now i’m a little stumped.
how does a spellcheck program decide OK, it won’t spell-CORRECT —– but only IF you use a lower-case “i” ? how does an android system find the reasoning to decide you are asking too much of it …. and simply lock down? i look at my registry values and it doesn’t explain the fact that at some point the complexity within interaction of thought, by different programmers — becomes LIFE.
a variable that is NOT predictable. so then you fall back to the question, is ANYTHING predictable? is there a false-assurance in math, and our stumbling hope to map reactionary characteristics? sure, the mechanics we get right. engineers and tensile strength. the basics of construction. the harnessing of ENERGY.
but the other day, i caught myself calling my computer “old Bessy.” Like my grandmother just asking the car to behave and get her where she needs to go — i was putting life into something that supposedly doesn’t have life.
which i don’t do. ever.
well, maybe once in awhile when i want to appear “normal.” but certainly not while BY MYSELF. perhaps the math of it all is going beyond what my feeble brain can quantify. perhaps this has something to do with my own notations of recent loss in memory. something to do with the rewiring necessary for me to gain that memory BACK. i have it back now.
did i tell you? yea. all fixed but for a hiccup here and there. just a stage as was getting used to my new Choline therapy.
want to know the difference between psych meds and vitamins? you don’t get withdrawals from vitamins.
how much of these programming are children, the brain children of programmers? how much of what i am noting, is just them learning to “play?” to come alive and bounce off one another?
don’t get me wrong … i understand the basics. i KNOW that differences superficially noted have a foundation in this beta OS being an ARM system. i get that are looking at greater screw ups but greater overall performance when talking about virtual UI’s. i CAN do the math.
that’s the problem. the math is not adding up. and i’m beginning to wonder ALL sorts of things now. are ghosts real? is there a pattern to aberrations of all existence, or is THAT alive, too?